Hachnosas Kalla

Rav Elimelech Biderman related that before he became a Rebbe, Rav Mordechai of Zvhil needed twenty-six thousand dollars for a coming chasuna. He asked the director of Yeshiva Eitz Chaim, where he learned, for the addresses of wealthy American donors so he could write to them. The director wanted those donors' support for the yeshiva, so he handed over only old addresses of people who had not given for a long time.

His wife told him that the list was surely of people with no money left, but Rav Mordechai said he was simply doing hishtadlus. "Then why write to all of them?" she answered. "Send one letter, and that will be your hishtadlus." He agreed, sent one letter, and soon received an envelope holding a check for the full twenty-six thousand dollars. When he thanked the director, the director was stunned and called the donor to ask how he had money to give a talmid, yet had stopped supporting the yeshiva.

The man explained that he had no money. His daughter, a kalla, had learned after her engagement that she was ill, and they had asked Rav Moshe Feinstein whether they had to tell the chosson's family. After asking about the illness, Rav Moshe ruled that they need not, and advised that if she had savings of her own, she should give them for hachnosas kalla. In the merit of helping another kalla reach the chuppa, she too would reach hers. At that very moment Rav Mordechai's letter arrived. She emptied her account and sent it.