The Earth Took the Blame for Us
The Apta Rav reads the earth's 'sin' as a hidden act of devotion, a way to ease the judgment of man.
Rashi notes that the earth was commanded to bring forth fruit trees whose wood tasted like the fruit, but she produced trees that bear fruit and did not, and that she was held to account when man was cursed. The Ohev Yisroel asks how the earth could possibly rebel, since she has no evil inclination. His answer is that she did not rebel at all. She saw that man, made from her dust, would be prone to failing, and she deliberately altered the command, so that when he stumbled, the fault could be pinned on his earthly body and not on his pure soul. She gave up her own good name for his sake. When man later sinned, the earth was held to account so that her devotion could come to light. For this reason, the Rebbe says, when we enter the land we are commanded to plant, and in doing so we repay her.
Source: Ohev Yisroel, Bereshis (on Bereshis 1:11 and Rashi)
When you or someone close to you falls short today, try the Apta Rav's distinction. The failing may come from a heavy, tired or pressured side, while the person underneath is sound. Say that to yourself before you say anything out loud: this is not who he is, and this is not who I am. Then respond in a way that speaks to the person beneath. You will find it easier to forgive, to apologize and to begin again, and you will be treating others the way the earth treated us.