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Leather Shoes on Tisha B'Av

A new Rav in Uhjel despaired of his community's laxity until Reb Shayele sent him to an unexpected ally.

A story ofRav Yeshaya Steiner of Kerestirהרב ישעיה בן משה שטיינרProfile ›

Rav Yoel Segal Pelner, who became Rav of Uhjel in Reb Shayele's last years, was a close friend of the Kerestirer Rebbe. He loved to call him a velts chacham, a sage of worldwide stature.

In Uhjel there was a known problem. Some unlearned Jews worked for non-Jews and had to wear leather shoes, and concluded that this allowed them to wear them all through Tisha B'Av, and so they walked into shul that morning for Shacharis and kinnos still wearing leather. The community leaders feared that the new Rav would shame them publicly. They urged him to be gentle, since it was better that these Jews err unknowingly than turn into open sinners. Rav Yoel was shocked. How could Jews come to shul in leather on the day the Beis HaMikdash burned? He said he could not stay as Rav in such a place.

Soon after, he went to Kerestir on a din Torah and told Reb Shayele the whole matter. The Rebbe closed his eyes as though dozing, and said, "Speak with rabbiner Roth." Rabbiner Roth led the status quo congregation, and Rav Yoel was bewildered, but the Rebbe repeated himself: speak with him and you will succeed.

Back in Uhjel, Rav Yoel invited Roth over and asked him to speak in his Shabbos sermon about the coming fast, the burning of the Beis HaMikdash, the mourning of generations, and the custom to refrain from leather shoes. Roth agreed. Rav Yoel then told his own congregation how it would look if even the status quo community knew these laws while the Orthodox flouted them. That year not one man came to shul in leather shoes.

Source: Mofes HaDor: Toldos Chayav ... shel Rav Yeshaya Steiner, ed. Shalom Eliezer Lichtenstein and Menachem Mendel Rubin (Brooklyn, 5771/2010).

Practical lessonLet the lesson come from an unexpected place

When you want someone to change, you may find that a direct rebuke only makes them dig in. Consider whether there is another path: a person they respect, a story, or a way of letting them see how things look from the outside. Today, think of one habit in your home or your community that bothers you, and ask yourself who might help it shift gently. Then take one small step toward that, with kindness and without public embarrassment for anyone.

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