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Too Small: Yaakov's Fall and the Jordan

Before meeting Esav, Yaakov says, “I am too small for all the kindnesses and all the truth.” Why call himself small just then? What has his staff to do with it, and why mention crossing the Jordan? And what does Iyov’s Leviathan, sure of the Jordan, have to do with this?

Bereishis 32:11
קָטֹנְתִּי מִכֹּל הַחֲסָדִים וּמִכָּל־הָאֱמֶת אֲשֶׁר עָשִׂיתָ אֶת־עַבְדֶּךָ כִּי בְמַקְלִי עָבַרְתִּי אֶת־הַיַּרְדֵּן הַזֶּה וְעַתָּה הָיִיתִי לִשְׁנֵי מַחֲנוֹת
I am too small for all the kindnesses and all the truth that You have done for Your servant; for with my staff I crossed this Jordan, and now I have become two camps.
35“I am too small for all the kindnesses and all the truth.” It seems to me that the kindnesses and the truth are two levels. The first is that of the ish chassid, the man of kindness, of whom it is written, “Gomel nafsho ish chassid, a man of kindness does good to his own soul”:1 the tzaddik who serves Hashem with faithfulness does good to his own soul. And truth is the level of Yaakov, as the verse says, “Give truth to Yaakov.”2 So Yaakov said, “I am too small for all the kindnesses and all the truth”: I have become smaller than this level, where I was a man of kindness and truth; now I have fallen from it and lost it. “For bemakli, with my staff …”: makli means “my staff,” but here it is read as meikil, being lenient. All this happened to me, my falling from these levels, because I was lenient with myself in some matter. “I crossed the Jordan”: I have also passed out of the level where it was in my hands to sweeten the dinim, the harsh judgments. Yarden, the Jordan (ירדן), hints at this: yarad din (ירד דין), “the judgment goes down.” Now I have passed out of that level and changed, and I can no longer sweeten the judgments.
קָטוֹנְתִּי מִכֹּל הַחֲסָדִים וּמִכָּל הָאֱמֶת. נ"ל דְּהִנֵּה כְּתִיב "גּוֹמֵל נַפְשׁוֹ אִישׁ חָסִיד", דְּהַיְינוּ הַצַּדִּיק הָעוֹבֵד הַשֵּׁם בֶּאֱמוּנָה הוּא גּוֹמֵל לְנַפְשׁוֹ, וְ"אֱמֶת" הוּא מַדְרֵגַת יַעֲקֹב כְּמוֹ שֶׁאָמַר תִּתֶּן אֱמֶת לְיַעֲקֹב, וְאָמַר יַעֲקֹב "קָטוֹנְתִּי מִכֹּל הַחֲסָדִים וּמִכָּל הָאֱמֶת", פֵּירוּשׁ קָטוֹנְתִּי מִמַּדְרֵיגָה זֹאת שֶׁהָיִיתִי אִישׁ חָסִיד וֶאֱמֶת, וְעַכְשָׁיו נָפַלְתִּי וְנֶחְסַרְתִּי מִמַּדְרֵיגָה זוֹ, "כִּי בְמַקְלִי כו'", פֵּירוּשׁ וְכָל זֶה הָיָה לִי שֶׁקָּטֹנְתִּי מִמַּדְרִיגוֹת אֵלּוּ מֵחֲמַת שֶׁהָיִיתִי מֵיקֵל לְעַצְמִי בְּאֵיזֶה דָּבָר. "עָבַרְתִּי אֶת הַיַּרְדֵּן" פֵּירוּשׁ וְגַם זֹאת שֶׁעָבַרְתִּי מִמַּדְרֵיגָה זוֹ שֶׁהָיָה בְּיָדִי לְהַמְתִּיק הַדִּינִים, לָזֶה רָמַז "יַרְדֵּן - יָרַד דִּין", וְעַכְשָׁיו עָבַרְתִּי וְנֶחְלַפְתִּי מִמַּדְרֵיגָה זֹאת שֶׁאֵינֶנִּי אוּכַל לְהַמְתִּיק הַדִּינִים.
  1. Mishlei 11:17. The verse reads ish chessed; the sefer has ish chassid. ↩
  2. Michah 7:20. ↩

Sources here

In shortYaakov's “I am too small” says he had fallen from his levels of kindness and truth, and from sweetening judgments, because he had been lenient with himself.
36This is the meaning of the verse said of the Leviathan: “He is confident that the Jordan will burst forth to his mouth.”3 Livyasan, the Leviathan, hints at the complete tzaddik, who cleaves to Hashem, blessed be He, and is joined (nilveh) to Him. “He is confident”: this tzaddik is sure “that the Yarden will burst forth,” that is, that he will make the judgments go down, “to his mouth,” by his holy mouth. This is easy to understand.
וְזֶהוּ שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר "יִבְטַח כִּי יָגִיחַ יַרְדֵּן אֶל פִּיהוּ" הַנֶּאֱמָר בְּלִוְיָתָן, דְּלִוְיָתָן רֶמֶז עַל הַצַּדִּיק הַשָּׁלֵם שֶׁהוּא דָּבוּק וְנִלְוֶוה להשי"ת ב"ה, וְזֶהוּ "יִבְטַח" פֵּירוּשׁ הַצַּדִּיק הַזֶּה הוּא בָּטוּחַ, "כִּי יָגִיחַ יַרְדֵּן" ר"ל שֶׁיָּגִיחַ לֵירֵד הַדִּינִים, "אֶל פִּיהוּ" ר"ל בְּפִיו הַקָּדוֹשׁ. וק"ל.
  1. Iyov 40:23. In Iyov the verse is said of the Behemoth (40:15). In Bava Basra 74b a baraisa reads it of the Jordan flowing into the Leviathan's mouth; Rava bar Ulla objects that it is written of the Behemoth, and reads it: the Behemoth is confident when the Jordan bursts into the Leviathan's mouth. ↩
In shortThe Leviathan, whose name speaks of being joined to Hashem, is the complete tzaddik, sure that his holy mouth can bring the judgments down.
The maamar as a whole

R’ Elimelech hears in Yaakov’s words a confession of a fall. Kindness is the level of the ish chassid, the tzaddik who serves Hashem faithfully and so does good to his own soul; truth is Yaakov’s own level, as Michah says. “I am too small” means: I have fallen from these levels. “With my staff,” bemakli, gives the reason: he had been meikil, lenient with himself in some matter. And “I crossed the Jordan,” Yarden, yarad din, means that he had passed out of the level where it was in his hands to sweeten the judgments. He closes with the Leviathan, livyasan, the complete tzaddik joined (nilveh) to Hashem, who is confident that by his holy mouth the judgments will go down.

Takeaway

When we feel we have slipped from a level, R' Elimelech points us to look for the place where we went easy on ourselves. And one who cleaves to Hashem can trust that the holy words of his mouth will bring the harsh judgments down.

Related learning

Sources he cites

· · · Iyov 40:23 · Bava Basra 74b

Tzaddikim he names

Yaakov Avinu

Translated with AI assistance. Sources and summaries were checked by a separate AI review; not yet reviewed by a human editor.

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